Monday, January 21, 2013
I wish I were single when I get my period...
So I wouldn't have to explain that the only thing I can do that day is lie in bed like a slug...and not feel bad about it. This is one of the drawbacks of marriage.
Friday, January 18, 2013
Writer's block
I have tons of awesome stuff to say...but I am never near a computer when the urge actually strikes me. It strikes me when I'm at the playground, stuck in traffic or in a meeting. It never hits when I am alone in the house, have five free minutes and have nothing on my DOITRIGHTNOW list.
Really, why is that?
Really, why is that?
Thursday, January 17, 2013
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Stuff I would never ever think I would hear myself say...
In the past few years I have heard myself actually say these things out loud...
1) Why did you finger paint with poop?
2) Why would try to eat a bottle of nail polish?
3) Why would you lie to me about eating that blue lollipop when there is still blue all over your mouth?
4) Yes, you do have to wear underwear to school.
5) Please don't let your hair drag on the ground (said while oldest was riding a merry go round at the park. I said that one last weekend. My oldest is 11.)
6) Please Please Please don't let your father know I put eminem on your ipod.
7) Why did you tell your father I put eminem on your ipod?
8) Um, no, you can't have popcorn (ice cream, Popsicles, pudding, jello, cake, cupcakes) for dinner.
9) Please don't write on your sister with sharpies (said to the oldest)
10) Please don't spit on your sister just because you are mad at her (said to my youngest)
11) Put your fist down now! (said to my youngest)
12) I hope the cat scratches you because then you might learn your lesson.
13) What do you mean you don't feel like going to school? It's kindergarten! They don't even grade!
14) Grandma bought you a padded bra? Mama is going to have words with Grandma.
15) One bite, just one! It's only sloppy joe! You can't get up until you take one bite! (2 hours later) Oh hell, just go to bed!
16) When I said put away your clothes, I meant put them away in your drawers. Bot the back of the closet (I say this at least once a week)
17) Go brush your teeth, I don't care if you don't wannnnaaaa.
18) BECAUSE THE SCHOOL DOESN'T LET YOU WEAR FLIPFLOPS!
19) I don't care if she did pinch you first, you don't pinch/hit/slap/spit back.
1) Why did you finger paint with poop?
2) Why would try to eat a bottle of nail polish?
3) Why would you lie to me about eating that blue lollipop when there is still blue all over your mouth?
4) Yes, you do have to wear underwear to school.
5) Please don't let your hair drag on the ground (said while oldest was riding a merry go round at the park. I said that one last weekend. My oldest is 11.)
6) Please Please Please don't let your father know I put eminem on your ipod.
7) Why did you tell your father I put eminem on your ipod?
8) Um, no, you can't have popcorn (ice cream, Popsicles, pudding, jello, cake, cupcakes) for dinner.
9) Please don't write on your sister with sharpies (said to the oldest)
10) Please don't spit on your sister just because you are mad at her (said to my youngest)
11) Put your fist down now! (said to my youngest)
12) I hope the cat scratches you because then you might learn your lesson.
13) What do you mean you don't feel like going to school? It's kindergarten! They don't even grade!
14) Grandma bought you a padded bra? Mama is going to have words with Grandma.
15) One bite, just one! It's only sloppy joe! You can't get up until you take one bite! (2 hours later) Oh hell, just go to bed!
16) When I said put away your clothes, I meant put them away in your drawers. Bot the back of the closet (I say this at least once a week)
17) Go brush your teeth, I don't care if you don't wannnnaaaa.
18) BECAUSE THE SCHOOL DOESN'T LET YOU WEAR FLIPFLOPS!
19) I don't care if she did pinch you first, you don't pinch/hit/slap/spit back.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)